2012 Australian Halloween costumes

Alan Jones: Bald skullcap, mouthful of bile, citation for public indecency.

Clive Palmer: XXXL suit, pillow, various cardboard speech bubbles with half though-out ideas (Let’s rebuild the Titanic, I’m going to run for Parliament, soccer is for girls etc).

Peter Slipper: Robe, bow tie, mobile phone, shell-less mussels.

Anthony Mundine: Boxing trunks, oversize prosthetic mouth, Dulux colour chart to determine who is and isn’t an Aboriginal (Recycled from last year’s Andrew Bolt costume).

Australian Olympian: Green and gold tracksuit, silver medal, petulant expression.

Unemployed newspaper journalist: Dirty clothes, three-day growth, sign reading “Will rehash press releases for food”.

One giant leap for corporate synergy

It’s July 21, 2069. The landing craft Aldrin IV eases down to the surface of Mars, kicking up dust unmoved for millions of years.

The air lock unlatches as silent as a Star Trek door in the vacuum of space. Down the ladder eases Richard Branson Beta, the first clone to graduate from M.I.T.

There’s no business like news business

He actually asked some half decent questions.

IT WAS CNN commentator Paul Begala who coined the phrase “politics is show business for ugly people” to describe the ego, talent and charisma needed to succeed in both high profile industries.

It reinforces the popular view that our leaders and legislators prioritise style over substance, like the film producers who keep hiring Megan Fox.

So you want to buy a book?

Nostalgia ain’t what it used to be

Those were the days . . .

Should there be a minimum time period before we are allowed to get nostalgic about certain things?

I understand the allure of a possible ABBA reunion or last year’s 20th anniversary of Nirvana’s Nevermind alubum. A respectable amount of time has elapsed since either were part of the zeitgeist and their now  mortgage-burdened fans have earned the right to once again smell the teen spirit.